Another Violet movie

Quick 300 review

As an action movie, 300 is certainly one of the best I've ever seen and hopefully will set the bar for all other sword-and-sandal epics in the future. Also, it looks just like a classic Frank Miller book, so it is needless to say it's gorgeous.

However, it is also the biggest steaming pile of Orientalist crap I've seen since Fu Manchu.

For anyone who missed Civil War: The Initiative

So, either Carol is a big liar or the next issue of Captain America will reveal that Steve is not dead but simply out of commission. Makes this all more Knightfall and less Death of Superman, which is a whole lot less cheap and obnoxious.

The Return of Captain America

Oh, wait. If you have been in an isolation chamber for the past 36 hours, SPOILER ALERT!!!

Now that's out the way, let's get to talking about the return of Captain America. Personally I'm betting on with the next nine months. And I'm being pretty liberal with that prediction.*

I've heard that Joe Quesada, as he makes the rounds at cable news shows, bringing attention to this fictional event, saying that "death needs to mean something in the Marvel Universe." And I call bullshit. Sorry, Joe, it just doesn't fly. Cap will be back in no time and let me tell why.

First, there's this guy:


That's the Winter Soldier, a.k.a. Bucky, a.k.a. one of the Three Forever Deads** who just so happens to not be dead anymore. You can not tell me that a superhero death is going to mean a thing when this guy appears in the same comic. If he can come back, a character who has been dead for over 40 years, then Steve's not going to be down for long at all.

Oh, and I'm also remember of this dude who showed up in Civil War #7:

Captain God Damn Marvel. Remember his death, how it shook the Marvel Universe, really made death mean something, gave such superpowerful characters a touch of mortality? Forget all that. He's back and hardly anyone even read the comic when he showed up after 25 years. Yeah, death really means something at Marvel lately.

Okay, that out of the way, let's get practical. When will Steve come back? Let's look at the facts:

1. The Fallen Son books are clearly about Captain America's death. They are at least three issues long. So he probably won't come back until they are over.
2. Captain America has not been canceled. If the series continues, as does the character. If Marvel were to cancel the book, it'd seem much more obviously permanent.
   
3. Steve spent twenty years practically dead, frozen in an ice cube. Once dead, never dead.
   
4. Captain America gets shot in the face for breakfast.

So, get back to me with your predictions. Maybe we can start a pool. For now I leave you with this thought:

Eh?

Eh?

Get your Cap on Frank!

*However, as Civil War pointed out, I suck at predicting comic book outcomes.

**The other two are Jason Todd (alive again) and Uncle Ben (don't even ask me what's going on there).

My Essential Essentials

I think I may be in the minority, but I love Marvel's Essential series of trades. I don't know what it is about 500+ of stories at a bargain price that makes me wanting more. And I especially don't miss the color. In fact, I think many of the comics look damn good in just black and white.

In any case, I like 'em but sadly too many of them are unappealing to me. Pretty much anything by Stan Lee is unreadable (sorry, Stan, you're a great creator but those old issues were baaaad), who the hell is Killraven and I don't think I'll ever want to read 500 pages of Ant-Man. There are the few that I love, but they just leave me wanting more of the stuff I'm actually interested in. Here's my Essentials wishlist.

Secret Wars: You can go two ways with this. There can be a single volume version with both Secret Wars and Secret Wars II along with some essential tie-ins, or it could be a two-volume set, one for the original and one for the sequel and each with plenty of tie-ins. I think it this would be a cool Essential mostly because I'd like to see the series feature important and classic storylines, not just reprint old stuff in order.

Uncanny X-Men, vol 2343: All I'm saying is don't stop with the Essential X-Men, Marvel. Best trade series ever.

She-Hulk, vol 2: Okay, I'm not 100% sure I would buy this one, as the idea of a colorless She-Hulk kinda turns me off. I haven't picked up the first volume for this very reason. But, I think it would be neat to see more classic Shulkie. Maybe have some old team-up or guest appearances, or maybe just skip right to the graphic novels and Bryne's Sensational series.

Man-Thing, vol 2: I may be hesitant on She-Hulk, but I definitely demand more Man-Thing. Seriously.

Punisher, vol 2: The first Essential Punisher is a bit of a disappointment, only showcasing his guest appearances and the first miniseries. I say we need a volume starting with #1 of his first ongoing. Punisher in black and white. Without Spider-Man. That would fucking rock.

New Mutants: This would be so awesome. Teenage stars + unusual powers + Bill Fucking Sienkiewicz in stark black and what = HAWT!

Daredevil, vol 8: Approximately when the Frank Miller stuff gets printed. Nuff said.

Classic X-Men, vol 3: Really, the old X-Men books hold very little appeal for me since they really were quite terrible. However, right before the book became nothing but reprints until the All-New All-Different relaunch, Neal Adams had a short stint as artist. And it looked awesome. Marvel needs to make one more Essentials in this series in order to reprint the Adams stuff. There aren't enough issues of X-Men left to fill a Essentials, but I'm sure there is plenty of Marvel Team-Ups and such to fill the space.

And about those Showcase things DC has: they're cool in the same way that Marvel Essentials are cool, but they've have a terrible time picking stuff to release. And there is the fact that before the seventies, everything DC did was goofy as hell and would just bug me to no end. But here's the one thing I would love for them to do:

Showcase Presents: Post Crisis Batman: Start with the reintroduction of Jason Todd and go from there. I would buy those by the truckload.

Meet Violet

Who needs blogging when you've just adopted the cutest hedgehog in the world?

Everyone, meet my baby Violet.